Singer/songwriter/sorcerers, fatigue fatigue, and friendly ghosts
Plus buying a book about your boss to try deal with your boss
Like this newsletter? Or the Depresh Mode podcast? Like how it all exists? If enough people donate, we can exist. If they don’t, the whole thing will shut down. Go here, pick a level that works for you, then select DEPRESH MODE from the list of shows. And thank you.
First, some not kidding around about the beautiful sad weeping glory of the world
This is my favorite song off the latest album by one of my favorite bands:
For some reason, my anxiety has flared up in recent years over things like traveling or going to a concert. This was happening before covid but a pandemic that kills millions certainly doesn’t help.
But I have also known all along that “going” to “places” is good for me. Jill (that’s Mrs. Moe) and I decided that, given two of our kids are grown and the other is 14 and is happy to be left home alone, we should go see more shows. And we have! Parliament/Funkadelic, The Decemberists, Nick Lowe, Wilco, Violent Femmes, lots of bands.
Last night, it was The National, which I attended with members of my own band, Math Emergency. The National is just a little too much Sad Dad for Jill to get excited about.
The elements were all in place:
This is my second concert this month at the Surly brewery in Minneapolis and it’s just the best. Indoor venues, even the venerable First Avenue, get real claustrophobic for me, increasingly so. When it’s mild weather, with a light breeze, with room to walk around no matter how many people are there (and my friend who works there gives me drink tickets), I can really enjoy the music. Finally. Completely.
I don’t know the mental health makeup of all members of this band but I can safely state that they’re in touch with some darkness and bleakness that people with depresh would recognize. And the narrator in the lyrics sure knows a lot about anxiety and dread.
Then the sorcery happens.
The National can generate hurtful thoughts and emotions into beautiful art. Nina Simone could do that. Van Gogh could do it too.
And imagine that! Imagine that kind of conversion technology, know-how, and generosity! It’s among the coolest things I can think of. A friend of mine was telling me how humans shouldn’t drink milk. We’re the only species that drinks another species’ milk and that’s weird and unnatural, she said. And fair point. But we’re also the only species that can make the blues. Ever heard armadillo blues? Fucking sucks, man.
Here’s a whole concert by The National, recorded well. You can watch it or just listen to it at work, as I will and am.
Thanks for reading Depresh Mode! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.
John Kelly consulted a book about Trump being crazy
And did so while working for Trump. As Chief of Staff.
The Dangerous Case of Donald Trump was a bestseller in 2017. It’s an anthology of essays by psychiatrists, concluding that the president was bonkers.
A new book by New York Times reporters Peter Baker and Susan Glasser, The Divider: Trump in the White House, 2017-2021, says John Kelly picked up a copy to try to figure what the frig was going on.
The editor, Dr. Bandy Lee, said:
“These come from observations of a person’s patterns of responses, of media appearances over time, and from reports of those close to him. Indeed, we know far more about Trump in this regard than many, if not most, of our patients.
“Nevertheless, the personal health of a public figure is her private affair – until, that is, it becomes a threat to public health.”
Kelly, a retired general, became Trump’s second chief of staff in July 2017 – after Trump fired Reince Priebus by tweet – and left the job in January 2019.
His struggles to impose order on Trump and his underlings and his virulent falling out with the president have been extensively documented. According to Baker and Glasser, who interviewed Kelly, the retired Marine Corps general bought a copy of The Dangerous Case of Donald Trump as he “sought help to understand the president’s particular psychoses and consulted it while he was running the White House, which he was known to refer to as ‘Crazytown’.”
Can you imagine having a boss that’s out of control, then BUYING A BOOK ABOUT YOUR BOSS to try to figure out how to do your job?
Here’s a picture of Kelly, consumed by dread, backstage when Trump was making his “good people on both sides” speech about Charlottesville.
Standing next to Kelly is Trump’s Senior Adviser for Infrastructure, D.J. Gribbin, who is my REAL LIFE BROTHER-IN-LAW AND I AM NOT MAKING THAT UP.
Kelly and D.J. resigned not long after this.
Hope Fatigue
I try to bring you a variety of mental health articles here, including ones that I don’t think are all that helpful. This one? Second category. It’s from the Washington Post and it’s about “hope fatigue”. I guess.
I’m noticing that many of my patients are experiencing a deficit of optimism, and are overwhelmed about important issues that are beyond their control.
I’m calling it “hope fatigue.”
People are tired of hoping that the pandemic will end, that the Ukraine war will be over, that mass shootings can be controlled, and that our government can address these pressing crises. Two in 10 Americans said they trusted the government in Washington to do what is right “just about always” or “most of the time” in a 2022 Pew Research Center poll.
Yeah, okay. It has tips on what to do to avoid this hope fatigue business but the tips are all either common sense suggestions or they’re results that you can’t just go out and try.
Take care of yourself. I tell my patients: “You have to be in good fighting shape to cope with the current turbulence.” That means boosting your resilience by taking care of your nervous system (sleep well, eat well, exercise wisely) and engaging in life-affirming activities.
Focus on the present. Get in the habit of anchoring yourself in the here and now. Fretting about the future is not helpful.
Try a breathing exercise. Taking a few deep breaths — for instance, inhaling to the count of five and exhaling to the count of five — will help calm your sympathetic nervous system (the fight or flight response) and lower your anxiety.
I’ve already got hope fatigue fatigue.
Fascinating look inside the mind of famed friendly ghost on the way
Check this headline!!
Casper psychiatrist publishes fourth book raising mental health awareness
I was so excited to read about this new book coming out. It’s by Casper’s psychiatrist!
First of all, I’m glad Casper is getting help. This liminal zone in which he spends all his time - not dead but not alive - must create existential trauma. Then you couple that with the trauma of whatever killed Casper the Friendly Child, there’s a lot to work out so seeing a psy…
Hold on, just now realizing that this is about a regular psychiatrist in Casper, Wyoming.
Never mind